Are you a caregiver to a loved one? It’s surprising how many of us are quick to answer “no” to that question. Sure, we help a loved one out a few times a week, take them to appointments and do their shopping. But for some reason, the majority of people acting in a caregiver role are hesitant to consider themselves “caregivers.” In fact, according to an AARP Caregiver Identification study, only about 19 percent of caregivers in the country are willing to identify themselves as such. 

There are a number of reasons we may be reluctant to attach that label to ourselves. Maybe it’s because being a “caregiver” implies that a loved has a disability or illness severe enough to require a higher level of care than we may be ready to acknowledge.

Also, it’s a title that carries a lot of responsibility. Let’s face it, most of us never expected to find ourselves in a caregiver role. The transition from being a “good son” or “helpful niece” to “caregiver” is a leap that can be difficult to accept.    

And does it really matter anyway? Is it really important to acknowledge that we’ve taken on a caregiver role? Actually, it’s very important, and here’s why: Acceptance of the situation can help to ease a caregiver’s burden in significant ways! 

Self-proclaimed caregivers are more confident:

It appears that people who self-identify as caregivers are more likely to seek out and take advantage of community and health care services that are available to them – services that can be beneficial in reducing stress and decreasing unmet needs in both the caregiver and care receiver.   
According to one research study, “affiliating oneself as a family caregiver appears to have positive benefits which include promoting effective use of community support services and creating a sense of belonging and connection to a broader community.” 

It’s only logical that a person who identifies as a caregiver would be more likely to include themselves in the larger community of caregivers, and may then begin to connect to people and resources that could offer them help, such as support groups, respite opportunities and educational classes.  

In another study, 83 percent of self-identified family caregivers said that once they started to think of themselves as caregivers, it gave them an increased sense of confidence when talking to healthcare professionals about their loved one’s care.

And over 90 percent of family caregivers said that they became more proactive about seeking resources and skills they need to assist their care recipient after they self-identified, according to a National Family Caregivers Association survey. Identifying as a caregiver can help to give us a sense of confidence and authority, which in turn can help to assure a loved one is receiving the very best care available to them.

So are you really a caregiver?

It may be helpful to understand if we’re acting in a caregiver capacity or not. There are several basic elements of care that comprise typical “caregiving,” including:

  • Helping with personal care: This may include bathing, grooming, toileting, exercise
  • Food preparation: Shopping for and preparing meals
  • Assisting with errands: Picking up prescriptions from the pharmacy, transportation to appointments
  • General care: Assuring a loved one is taking medications and getting to all of their appointments. 
  • Emotional support: Being relied on for personal and emotional support
  • Health monitoring: Keeping track of vitals, noting changes in their health, and reporting to doctors.

If we are helping with some or most of these activities, chances are we are acting as a caregiver for a loved one. There are a number of support programs available to help caregivers manage stress and reduce unmet needs for ourselves and a loved one. We Care. . . Because You Do is a telephone – and email-based care coordination program for individuals caring for an older loved one with chronic health conditions that provides simple, practical solutions and ongoing guidance to empower caregivers to manage care and decision-making throughout their caregiving experience.  

It can feel good to admit it!

Many people get a real sense of value from being a caregiver. There can be positive psychological benefits associated with acknowledging caregiver status, including a sense of fulfillment and satisfaction from the caregiving role. Just over half of caregivers surveyed in the AARP 2020 Caregiving in the U.S Report indicated that their role has given them a sense of purpose in their life. 

The transition to self-identified caregiver can happen at any stage of the caregiving journey and it can be sudden or gradual. Some individuals have found that it’s easier to adopt caregiver status following a health crisis or accident that creates a clear-cut need for a loved one to require care.  
For some people, their loved one’s diagnosis and their interaction with the health care system made them aware that they were family caregivers, says a survey from the National Family Caregivers Association. But for over 75 percent of family caregivers, it was the act of helping their loved one with personal care that contributed significantly to their self-identification.

In any case, helping a family or friend caregiver to accept the important role they play in the care of a loved one may help them to achieve greater peace of mind, and to take advantage of much-needed assistance from the many support resources available to them.